Have you ever thought if the connections in your life are flourishing or causing you to detach from yourself? It does take a minute to answer that because we humans do not create connections with a motive all the time. Some come naturally. On the other hand, self-discovery is something that we have heard as we gradually enter our teenage years and adulthood. It is a word mostly used by people who feel lost or have gone through tough times and are hoping to reconnect with themselves and understand themselves better. 

We grew up meeting and creating connections with so many people. Some last and some do not. Some are magical and some drain the life out of us. Nevertheless, they all have something to teach and mold us. We create connections and bonds not knowing how it may end. Well, that is the thing you see. We can only cherish or move on from connections. For instance, if a connection lasts and helps us flourish, we can only be grateful for it and make sure the connection is sustained. The same goes for a connection that does not last. We can only look back and be grateful for what was there and move forward. Regret can be a temporary emotion to help us look back and learn from. It should not cause us to feel like we could have changed or avoided something that caused it to break or fade. Because doing so hinders us from moving forward. More

importantly, doing so disconnects us from ourselves. We stop caring about our emotions and our life at that moment. 

It is unfair to invalidate our pain and problems when we know how difficult it was when we were going through tough times. Take your time to love yourself. Learn about yourself by spending time with yourself more. Do things that disassociate you from the rest of the world until you find peace within yourself. It is not an easy and quick process. As the phrase goes 'Life is not a race but a marathon', self-discovery and connection take time. You learn what you like and do not, what you are comfortable with, what brings you joy, and how you react to things or people. Even the smallest thing that you discover about yourself is a step towards self-discovery. Some may take months, and some may take years. At the end of the day, you know you are heading toward discovering more and more amazing things about yourself. 

There are some things that we all can do to never lose ourselves. Firstly, never settle for things that you are not okay with just to keep a bond. It may seem okay at first but later you will start noticing yourself being okay with the bare minimum. Be it friends or a relationship, never give up on yourself and your principles. Any connection that requires you to give up any one of these will only disconnect you from your true self. Secondly, if you find yourself in a situation of despair despite doing so much to sustain a connection, take a break and reflect. Is it bringing you peace? If yes then you may want to consider choosing yourself rather than that connection. But if it still leaves you in despair then the problem might not be the connection but something else. Take your time and find out the root of the unsettling feeling. Lastly, in cases of uncertainty, choose you. You will never go wrong doing so. Even on the hardest days choose you and be kind. 

It is not an overnight process. Self-discovery can take pretty long but it is not impossible. It is an endless process whereby you find yourself learning more new things about yourself on the smallest scale. However, that would help you understand why you are the way you are. Just fill yourself with so much love towards yourself and you will relinquish all that anger and hatred out of yourself.